I Really Should Have Listened to Oprah

I used to love watching the Oprah show. Every afternoon. I'd rush home from work, snap on the little color tv in the kitchen while whipping dinner together for the kids. Just in time. For an hour of power. A time of wisdom and clarity amid the hustle bustle of being a working mom.

Oprah had a way with words. A turn of phrase. And one of her favorite sayings has become one of mine:

WHEN SOMEONE SHOWS YOU WHO THEY ARE...BELIEVE THEM.

 

Usually when some deep, meaningful kernel like this drips from Oprah's lips I am totally onboard. As she says, a true "Aha Moment". And I try to bear it in mind in all facets of my life.

 

But recently I realized that I had failed. I neglected to keep the above wise words front and center in my brain. And it came back to bite me in my wide backside.

 

Someone close to me had been showing me for a while who they were and I did not believe them. Instead I projected what and who I wanted them to be onto them. Clouding my eyes. And my perception of them.

 

Now they have shown me who they really are and my eyes have been opened. Wide.
 

Why am I surprised? Hadn't I seen the signs? They'd been there all along.

 

No. I wanted to believe. That's how I roll. I always want to believe that there's inherent good in the hearts of everyone. So I wanted to believe they were honest, kind and loving. That even though we came from different worlds, different generations I accepted them. Warts and all. We didn't always agree on music, books, movies, fashion, whatever, But I thought for sure we were on the same page when it came to family. Love. Trust. Loyalty. I thought we were friends.

 

I pushed aside my suspicions. And that was wrong.
 

I don't think I'll ever understand the choices people make. But I truly do understand even more the wise words from my tv mentor, Oprah:

 

WHEN SOMEONE SHOWS YOU WHO THEY ARE...BELIEVE THEM.