My Friend Jenny Craig

Made a new friend this year. Her name is Jenny Craig. She's been supportive and helpful in getting my life and health back.

I've fought the battle of the bulge for many years now. It's been hard to keep the weight off while fighting health issues. And getting older, I truly understand when they say as we age our metabolism slows down. The weight just doesn't come off as quickly as it used to. All attempts on my part to do it on my own were met with failure.

At the beginning of 2012, I put a plan in place. I found a very good doctor and had surgery for some medical issues that had been plaguing me for years. I also clamped down on my overeating.

And then I enlisted Jenny's help. It's been great! The food is delicious. The structure was just what I needed. And I love my counselor; she's so encouraging and understanding. Matter of fact, I know I can count on any of the counselors at my local Jenny location.

So far I've lost almost 30 pounds. 2 dress sizes. Lots and lots of inches. And I'm close to my goal. Need to lose another 15.

I feel healthier. I feel more energy. I think I look better. I'm able to exercise better and longer. I'm even attempting the "couch to 5k" plan so I can run in a 5k next spring. All thanks to the surgery and the weight loss.

But now I feel stuck. I recently lost my job. And there've been some other stressful family and health crises. I'm depressed. Stressed. The scale shows it. It isn't budging much. It's going up and down. 3 pounds up, 2 down. 1 up, 3 down. Argh!!!!!

I'm fighting my relationship with Jenny. I know she means well and she's good for me. But I keep slipping away from her.

I'm an emotional eater. When I'm feeling down, I want to eat. And at times, I throw in a few margaritas to wash it down. Its so hard to control the urge to splurge when I feel like my life is out of control. It ain't easy trying to keep a stiff upper lip and be positive 24 hours a day when all I feel like doing sometimes is cry.

My logical brain tells me to stay on an even keel to get thru this transition and think of it as my time for reinvention. Things will get better. You can do this.

My emotional brain says "pay no mind to Ms. Logical over there".

Gah! This is soooo hard.